China: greetings, food, celebrations and working together

China at a glance

China has more than 1.4 billion people, 56 ethnic groups officially recognised, including the Han majority, and a vast range of climates and landscapes. Standard Mandarin, Putonghua, is the national language, and many people also speak regional languages such as Cantonese, Shanghainese or Hokkien, or minority languages such as Tibetan, Uyghur, Zhuang and Mongolian. Life in Shanghai, Chengdu, a Yunnan village or a Beijing hutong can feel very different, so treat any summary as a starting point.

Greetings and first meetings

A light handshake with a slight nod is the usual greeting, and a smile matters more than a firm grip. Chinese names put the family name first: in Wang Wei, Wang is the surname. Address people by surname with a title, such as Manager Wang or Teacher Li, until invited otherwise. Nǐ hǎo is the standard hello, and nín hǎo is more respectful for elders.

Business cards are offered and received with both hands, read for a moment and placed carefully on the table, not pushed into a pocket. Elders and seniors are greeted first, and introductions often follow seniority.

Etiquette and everyday customs

Respect for age, seniority and harmony is strong. “Face”, mianzi, means dignity and reputation, so avoid criticising or contradicting someone in front of others, and praise colleagues in public. Modesty is common; compliments are often declined politely, and gifts are often refused two or three times before being accepted.

When giving a gift, use both hands and avoid clocks, which sound like “attending a funeral”, as well as white or black wrapping, associated with mourning. Four sounds like the word for death, so many buildings skip it, while eight is considered lucky. Remove shoes when entering homes, and do not point with one finger; use an open hand. Red envelopes, hóngbāo, hold cash gifts for weddings and New Year.

Food and table manners

Chinese cooking is regional, with dumplings and noodles in the north, rice and lighter dishes in the south, spicy Sichuan food, delicate Cantonese dim sum, and the sweeter dishes of Jiangsu and Shanghai. Meals are shared: dishes are placed in the middle, often on a turntable, and everyone takes from them. The host usually orders more than people can finish, as a sign of generosity.

Do not stick chopsticks upright in rice, which resembles incense at funerals, and do not pass food from chopstick to chopstick. Use serving chopsticks if provided. Toasts are made with ganbei, bottoms up, although you may sip if you prefer not to drink. Tea is poured for others before yourself, and tapping two fingers on the table thanks the person pouring. Tipping is not customary in mainland China.

Major celebrations

Spring Festival, the lunar new year, falls between late January and mid-February and is the main family reunion of the year, with a dinner, red envelopes, fireworks in many places and the Lantern Festival fifteen days later. The Mid-Autumn Festival takes place on the full moon of the eighth lunar month, with mooncakes and moon-gazing.

• Spring Festival: Chinese New Year
• Mid-Autumn Festival: China’s moon festival

Other holidays are the Qingming tomb-sweeping festival in spring, the Dragon Boat Festival, and National Day on 1 October, followed by a week-long holiday.

Weddings

Chinese weddings blend ancestral customs with modern styles and vary widely by region. Our guest’s guide to a Chinese wedding explains red envelopes, banquets and dress.

• How to attend a Chinese wedding: a guest’s guide

Working or studying with people from China

Relationships, guānxi, help business move: expect shared meals and time to build trust before agreements. Hierarchy matters, and decisions may be taken by senior people after discussion in the team, so be patient and avoid pushing for an immediate answer. A direct “no” can be uncomfortable, so “this may be difficult” or silence may be a polite refusal; ask open questions and confirm in writing.

WeChat is used for both work and daily life, including sharing documents, voice messages and payments, and many Chinese apps differ from those used in Europe. Mainland China uses one time zone, UTC+8, with no daylight saving, which is useful when scheduling. Plan around Spring Festival and the October National Day holiday, when most businesses close for about a week and travel is very heavy. Colleagues may work long hours; respect their private time as well.

Frequently asked questions

How do I address a Chinese colleague?

Use the family name plus a title, such as Director Zhang, until you are invited to use the given name or a nickname. Many people working internationally also use an English name.

Is it rude to refuse a gift?

Gifts are often refused politely two or three times first. Offer again, and accept with both hands when it is your turn.

Why is the number four avoided?

In Mandarin, four, sì, sounds like the word for death, sǐ. Eight sounds like the word for prosperity, so it is considered lucky.