/Nigeria

How to attend a Nigerian wedding: a guest’s guide

Invited to a Nigerian wedding? Expect colour, music, dancing and plenty of family. Customs differ greatly between Nigeria’s many cultures and faiths, so here is a guide to what guests often experience.

Bright, festive outfits; if the families have chosen aso ebi fabric for guests, wearing it is a lovely gesture.

Gifts or cash are common; check the invitation for a registry, and follow the hosts’ lead on how money is given.

Often a full day, and many couples hold a traditional ceremony and a church, mosque or civil wedding on separate days.

Congratulations!: English is widely understood; many guests add greetings in Yoruba, Igbo or Hausa.

Reply as the invitation asks; some events request that guests bring their invitation card.

Many cultures, many traditions

Nigeria is home to hundreds of ethnic groups and several major faiths, so there is no single Nigerian wedding. Many couples hold a traditional wedding, rooted in their family’s culture, as well as a Christian, Muslim or civil ceremony, sometimes on different days. Families play a central role throughout, and customs vary between communities, regions and families.

What guests may see

At a Yoruba traditional engagement, two representatives, one for each family, guide the ceremony with humour. The groom and his friends greet the bride’s family by prostrating, a sign of respect called idòbálẹ̀, and the bride kneels to receive blessings from both families. At an Igbo traditional wedding, the highlight is the igba nkwu, or wine carrying: the bride carries a cup of palm wine through the crowd to find her groom, sips from it and offers it to him, and when he drinks, the union is publicly recognised. In Hausa culture, marriage follows Islamic practice, with stages such as the formal visit to the bride’s family, the sadaki or bride price, and the wedding itself, known as the Fatiha. Kola nuts, prayers and blessings from elders are common at many ceremonies.

The celebration

Receptions are joyful, with live music, food and dancing. Many families choose aso ebi, a matching fabric worn by relatives and friends to show their bond with the couple. At many celebrations, guests shower money on the dancing couple, a custom known as spraying. Spraying banknotes is legally restricted in Nigeria, so many families now use alternatives such as envelopes or baskets; follow the hosts’ lead.

  • Ask the couple whether there is aso ebi for guests, and how to get it.
  • Greet elders respectfully, and follow the MC’s cues during the ceremony.
  • Join in the dancing when the couple make their entrance.
  • Thank the couple and their families before you leave.
  • Do not assume every Nigerian wedding follows the same customs.
  • Do not take photos during prayers if the hosts ask you not to.
  • Do not wear white if it might clash with the bride’s outfit, unless the dress code says otherwise.

Nigerian weddings are usually family-centred, and families with younger children are often welcome, but check the invitation. Days can be long and loud, so pack snacks, ear protection for very young guests and a change of clothes. Younger family members often love joining the dancing.

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Explore the culture ↓

If a colleague invites you, ask whether there is aso ebi for guests. A card with a gift or cash, following the couple’s wishes, is appropriate.

  1. Learn a few words first. A greeting in someone's own language shows you made the effort.
  2. Watch before you adapt. Notice how people greet, meet and decide.
  3. Ask, don't assume. Every team is different, so check how colleagues like to work.
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What is aso ebi?

A matching fabric, chosen by the families, that relatives and friends have made into outfits to show their bond with the couple. Guests are often invited to buy and wear it.

What is igba nkwu?

The Igbo wine-carrying ceremony. The bride finds her groom among the guests and offers him palm wine; when he drinks, their union is publicly recognised.

Why are there two weddings?

Many couples hold a traditional ceremony rooted in their family’s culture as well as a religious or civil wedding, sometimes on different days.